Lucky Luck

If u look at all the gifts , that i've given her (Hand made)

U'ld've <-! thought that shes lucky to have me. for all the heart and effort i'ld willingly put in to each gift.
but

i think , i'm luckier ..

Love is everything pleasant ,
And to be able to enjoy such immense pleasure of LLLLing

can i be luckier?

NIA

i am NIAN! Nian is a constant variable , unlike me , subjected to emotions . Daily trivialities and uncertainties . Nian is how i ought to be and how i want myself to be . So let my name be nian . and to be called upon as nian shall serve as my reminder to KICKASS!

I AM NIAN!

As that , i shall be

- * AWESOME

- *Asskicking

- UNPARALLELED QUALITIES

- SAINTLY-est MORALES.

remember . THEY;re all subjective to my interpretation

Shes really pushing the limits.

Always taken for granted never once appreciated .

Lets see how much more i can tolerate such nonsense .

Fingers crossed , hopes for much regrets . only then i know its worth it

Irregularities brings forth unplanned possibilities .
I'm just not smart enough for there is too many things to contemplate about .

fuck , i wanna live alone .

Cause relative to you relative to me , i'm relatively relative to the assumptions of the society with regards to our definition of relationships .

Rules of life :2

Rules of reasoning.

What is true and what is not.

So we come about a fact. or a "truth"

and how do we know that, wat is true to us is the truth?

say if we adopt a reductionist way of thinking.

We break it down, taking a *truth* and relating to the very truth* that is it based upon.

and so on. until we reach the truth of the truths.

And then we ask

What is left to verify the truth of the truth so that the whole of the truth is true?

This reductionist approach brings us to relativism.

Say if we argue that, the fact is the fact of truth. and the truth is based on the fact and the fact is true.

How did we come upon the fact that supports the fact of the truth?

A Fact is the opinions of the public

and opinions are relative to an individual's subjective deductions.

and what is deducing?

the process of deducing is diluted by our opinions, past present experiences and also very much diluted by our grey morals.

and then what the hell is true about the truth?

Such debates can be never ending. and hence

Hugo suggest that, there ought to be a priori reasoning which are presupposed in our commonsense.(COMMON sense?) which are not established through deductions.

With that he suggested

Lonergan's 4 transcendal precepts

Which is to

be attentive

be intelligent(hypothesize)

be reasonable(picks the utmost true , instead of one that gratifies oneself)

be responsible(stay true to the reasoning)

And with that i shall APPLY the 4 precepts w regards to morals and interpersonal relationships(which is very very grey)

rules of life :1

Bertrand says

"Fallacy - to think inadequately at all times instead of adequately at times."

How am i supposed to ignore native callings of my emotional quarters and focus more on my reasoning , big picture . frontal cortex , wise decisions?

If i can , if only i can make properly reasoned decisions all the time. i'll be a perfect being.

However that would take away the fun of living huh.

because it is never logical to do crazy , pea inducing stuff.

And with this.

i need balance.

Rules for life.

Without rules , there will be no plans.

To be without plans , is to live with fictitious goals

Get my life sorted, get my rules instated .

I'll start with ,

“The six mistakes of Man”:Cicero’s Six Mistakes of Man.

1. The delusion that personal gain is made by crushing others.
2. The tendency to worry about things that cannot be changed or corrected.
3. Insisting that a thing is impossible because we cannot accomplish it.
4. Refusing to set aside trivial preferences.
5. Neglecting development and refinement of the mind, and not acquiring the habit of reading and studying.
6. Attempting to compel others to believe and live as we do.

Now lets start living with a plan

STUBBORN

I DONT THINK I'M STUBBORN

i just...

believe in what i believe better then what i believe others believe in me

NON-sense, No sense, NONSENSE

HA! Sense?

Lets study our language.

Non-sense? No sense?

So NON sense is the opposite of common sense?

I believe that i'm not common

Hence my posts are No sense.

I wish to believe that i think, nothing like that of the COMMON

hence , my sense , of sense . Is NONSENSE

"so to be unique , u've to be nonsensical"

And funny thing is , Society . Hierarchy.

When, you're lousy and unique/nonsensical . You're nonsense.

When you're good and unique /nonsensical . You're super sense

COCO

MAN, iwannalosemysenseofcommonsense.

i wanna be happy!

NON-SENSE

Makes sense?

What make sense and what doesnt?

And what does COMMON sense mean?

I know one thing for sure , and that is. Sense is society defined.


And if we ever thought , what does COMMON sense mean?
Common , in a sense that, common is shared.
Shared by the society that we live in.


And i've always asked myself, where does this COMMON , Society defined sense come from?

Take from example, sense.
It doesnt make sense if i am a chinese to run over a pile of flaming stones.
Religious sense.

There are many of the COMMON sense that are common within us.

AND THE PROBLEM IS

The COMMON sense, bestowed upon us as virtues in our toddler days . Sticks as values .
And such values are barriers that are restricting us to achieve nirvana , or eternal happiness.

say , a bmx rider. BOY that guy is fucking awesome.
Backflip tailwhips and all, but hey. To common folk with common sense, hes anything BUT successful.

Say a banker, Yes , someone who slogs hard, makes money .
Sense tells me that he is successful.

But hey, i'm sure the bmx rider is as hardworking, if not HARDER working then the banker.
And why is he not successful?

Successful?
In what?
Life or Within the society,

"WHY DO WE OFTEN PEG OUR SUCCESS TO THAT OF THE SOCIETY AND NOT TO OUR LIVES?"

How does the society matter to us , before or after our lives

And once again. What is success in life?
Happiness?
And what is preventing that happiness? (or in another sense , the ability and freedom to do whatever they like)

Our , understanding of SENSE.
How we understand our sense, i believe .
Is bestowed upon us during the earlier days of our childhood.

We've been told, and programmed . When young to believe that shit is dirty , sex is evil.
Have we ever not been told such things , will we abstain from enjoying the latter?

However i believe such virtues is good, in a sense . Like religion keeps us away from harm.

AIYO , i fucking lazy to type already.

CONCLUSION.

SENSE SEPERATES US ALL,
SENSE is like a form of POISON. BLESSED BY OUR PARENTS.
SO THAT WE'LL suffer that same monotonous , unsatisfying life that they had.

I wish that one day, i'll put down all my forms of common sense. And enjoy what little life i've got. 80 years aint long.
I've got to live. In a plan , out of my plan.

I NEED A PLAN

WE NEED A PLAN. I NEED A PLAN.

WHY?

I will really start living after i have a plan.

At the age of 20. i am ENLIGHTENED ahahahaha. YES

i mean seriously , what have i been doing? and what do i know about my life?

I've been living for 20 years, nono . Infact I've only been following a plan.

A plan that is set out by the very society i live in

I dont even exist at all.

I'm just an Ant in a trail of ants

i dont live

i dont exist

i am insignificant

i am one amongst the sea of many.

To me , to you am i just a relationship. AND that relationship is defined once again by our binding society. our society is my god. i am relative to you that is relative to a relationship defined by a culmulative , central power which is in otherwords the mean of our combined expectation. AKA SOCIETY. FUG MY LIFE.

You see , that is how sad my life was.

people buy sports cars, big houses .. WHY?

Do they actually think they can prove their existence with such *VALUABLE* possessions?

In a bigger picture, They dont.

They still do not exist , they're still one of the many.

It is just that , they've reached a new stage in the plan. The plan that binds everyone from birth.

The plan of our society.

every kid is born. With a plan

Every kid is born ,

to start walking

to start learning

to start schoolings

to start relationships

to start a career

to start a family

to start earning money

to start affording expensive items

and then, we're all well integrated into the plan.

then we start to grow old

we start to age

we start to fail, our memories and our bodies.

and fuck! i ask myself when do i start living?

living , not in the sense where we live our existence.

i wanna live my life, and what the fuck is my life?

I've been well into the plan that i forgot to see anything and everything beyond the binding plan of my life/society.

and then

at the end of the day, we're just part of a cycle.

An invisible plan that binds us all.

A plan where we play little to no-part at all. A plan that we're neither the M or the X or the C we play no part in affecting the Outcome (Y).

Then.. We just vanish

after 3 generations .

WHO IS NG.SHENG.NIAN?

OUR EXISTENCE ARE MEANINGLESS

IF

We're NOT the BEST

Human selection, Humans, reproduce

through the selection of the best

If we're not the best, our off springs will not be the best

And then . why do we exist?

I WANT TO BE THE BEST

I want to be above the plan and to be above the plan i have to have a plan

AND HENCE

I NEED A PLAN.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

i love my crap

oh yea, i really am going to live after poly life.

You'll see.

i need to survive before i can live! YESSA!

Goal.

Seems like, i'm luckily unlucky to have a dad like mine.
whose shoes are so big , that if i ever wanted to be seen as successful.
I'ld have to fill his shoes first.

The benchmark is pretty damn high .

Living up to expectations is not enough, but ... damn.
I cant see the expectations.

No matter how well i do, i'll still be ... as expected. Cause my dad is greater then the greats.
Hes got an interesting life story to boast. I don't.

I've got motivation. but i'm still a bum.
I'm nothing , more then his shadow.

Being nice.

Everyone wants to be nice.

but some of us tries too hard to be nice.

We think, how come some people.

Pulls of being-nice so easily?
Folks nation wide reveres him/her as the almighty nice one. everyone praises him/her for being nice.

but here you are , trying so hard to be nice.
being nice to whom you think are a bunch of ingrates. Taking your nice deeds for granted.

How fucking annoying is that?

Then...

Why are we TRYING to be nice?

Why do we find it hard to turn down requests from our friends?
Requests of NICE* deeds from you.

Do we genuinely want to help or do we help cause we find it hard to turn them down?

In otherwords,

Are you a nice person? Or are you asked to be a nice person?

(and you find it hard to turn down a chance for you to be who you want/ought to be)

Its annoying how we all preach that , if we're genuinely nice. We do it out of goodwill, we do not expect reciprocation.
And yet we curse and swear at those ingrates.

Why? because . we're nice cause we're asked to be.

Appreciation is vital. To us , is the basic hygiene of being nice.

but being nice, we're doing it for someother's benefits isnt it?

To all of us we tries to be nice, and be nice only when we're asked to be.
Its good that we try.
But dont allow one or two ingrates* to stop you from being nice to others who appreciate.
Because they are deserving.

And why do we TRY-ERs

expect so much?
Cause we TRY-ers , blow up every nice thing we do.
We think of it as a self-sacrificing deed, when being nice is to overlook oneself and work for the benefit of others.

we fail to be genuinely nice and that is to overlook oneself.


So lets all try to be nice, cause you want to.

22nd July

An unlikely NO.
Damn depressing.

Come on . let it be a YES.that is what i wish to hear, on JULY 22nd .

With regards to the thing i really really want.

come on man. help me pray for me.

Frog

Pictures of my frog.

You guys know that. my frog will be rid of the green.
going back to GREY. BORING GREY

Why?
It wll be given to my mom.
(my next ride will only come in september)

I miss my greeen coloured car

Credit princess Gabriella for the superb pictures

Inactivity.

Back and blogging.
Schools been shiet. very fucking boring. project works. gah.

Been awhile back, 2 months to be close to exact.
Thanks everyone for the 3x birthday surprise man!

12 midnight, candles by my carpark. FUCKING AWESOME MAN!
6-7pm the next day, people @ the JU-JU restaurant. THANKS MAN!
Later at night 10pm-12am - MORE PEOPLE at some random carpark behind.
DAMN NICE DAMN FAIRY-TALE. They lit the whole carpark with candles (a route with candles into the stairwell where i fed my pores cheesecake. haha . THANKS MAN!

FOLKS behind the surprise (THANKS MANY MANY)

hao

mun

bock

Sherwin

clement

terry

limin

weijin

Dudes who wished me happy birthday . SMS or MSN

suern

junjie

sujun

julius

alvin

waileong

tzetian

timwee

alicia

joe liu

meisheng

heng see meng(drift shifu)

alvin tham

justice

Jeremy Bmx

Theron

Gabriel Princess

Kwok siang

devon

how chun

Havi!

People who came for the surprises/event

hao

mun

bock

Sherwin

clement

terry

limin

weijin

Sujun

tzetian

Nigel

tuan jiaw

James

weiliang

Yiang hai

joe liu

waileong

ian

mitcher

darren

chiumun

hoihin

People who wished me on facebook

Raied

Joel Zee

Douglas

Walton

Gabriel - Drifter

Alvin tan - Drifter

Szuhui

Malcom Bs

Michelle BS

Stella BS!

NEATO

Thanks alot man. most eventful birthday ever

Self-worth

Importance , to the most important person in the world i'm unimportant as he is important to me for i'm unimportantImportance , to the most important person in the world i'm unimportant as he is important to me for i'm unimportant

So how do you intepret? - by 2.

she is important because i'm unimportant to her(her standpoint)

I'm unimportant in my own opinion therefore she is important to me.

Society moulds people not to sek self-fuilfilment but to seek acceptance.

The measure of importance of the people around you. General public's opinions are imporant to yuo for yuo are unimportant

Society moulds people not to seek self-fulfilment bu to seek acceptance.

The measure of importance of the people around you. General public opinions are important to you for you are unimportant.

Why do people around me conforms their priorities to the unimportant people aruond them . Unimportant to their future/well-being.

How can my cow , put herself before others, to understand the true importance of her important self and important health.

Motivation- Find a role model
Mental restructure - Priorities based on her interest and not expectation of others.

Most importantly, she has to understand her own importance in the society.

Cow ! Change for the better.

I can offer no more then mental reassurance. but that is if i'm of a significant importance.

Blogshop!

The best blog shop ever!

http://spreegalleria.livejournal.com/

VISIT NOW!

Comes complete with prompt customer service.
Excellent shop owner. unbelievably polite.

GOGOGO!

GET IT NOW!

My babies

Meet my babies.
The frog and the cow.

Sexiest part of my cow = the eyes.


Fucking pretty tail-lights

Skyline GT -500bhp (ok big numbers. but i dont dare to push em)

Pretty long car. i love the side profile

Look goooood fromt he back. Black rims will be much better

Yello!


Say hi to THEFROG

The WOOHOOs done

seemingly seemless

Oh man!
Say if i hadn't take the initiative to do anything.
There wouldn't be anything done at all.

We'll all just wait, cause the sheeps needs to be herded.

and its always me being the dog.


So when will the mammals call?*(me first)




hahaha . anyways.
"God be thanked, the meanest of his creatures......"




Do i be bothered about not being bothered
Or bothered about being bothered about not being bothered
Or bothered about not being bothered about not seeming bothered when bothered




Pitfalls of happiness.(mine)
To think inadequately at all times, instead of thinking adequately at times.





Heres a super fucking awesome poem by walt whitman(a repost in my blog)


I think I could turn and live with animals,
they are so placid and self-contained,
I stand and look at them long and long.
They do not sweat and whine about their condition,
They do not lie awake in the dark and weep for their sins,
They do not make me sick discussing their duty to god,
Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things,
Not one kneels to another, nor to its kind that lived thousands of years ago,
Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxcjTaTXJcI