All that i've ever wanted.

I've got nothing that i've ever wanted.
but somehow. it all turns out better then i ever wanted.

ELABORATED HOLIDAY PLANS

Yes! 8am in the morning. i'm wide awake! not because i woke up early. but its because. i've gone beyond the point of exhaustion . now i am in a state of trance. neither tired nor energetic.


Anyways.i'm blogging about
MY HOLIDAY RESOLUTIONS!

Coming 6 weeks.i'm going to make full use of it.

When i've all the time in the world to myself. i tend to waste them.
My buddies friends. having attachment.

Plenty of time to catch up with myself. with the nian in 2006.

hahaha

SO WHAT MUST I DO THIS COMING HOLIDAYS!

STAY HEALTHY yes. (SLEEP EARLY)

1. I want to read all the books that i've bought.
   Brush up my english.(its poo in comparison to me in 06)
2. Go and run
   (Not that i wanna keep fit, but i figured. my little efforts now can help me avoid that 3 months extra NS)
3. Brush up on my card magic, and other manipulations
   ( i wanna learn to impress, myself )
4. I want to ride well. ride more bikes.
   Level up in BMX riding, i dont one to be just another biker. i wanna be NIAN!
5. I wanna play my bass well. Play it with feel and funk.
6. I wanna learn how to play Wedding bells on my guitar for my lepak buddy
7. Catch up on the world news
8. Learn some dessert dishes from my sister (DAMN GOOD I TELL YOU)

8 items, thats a lot! but

Brief outlines of my plans for the two weeks,

Wake up at 10am.(not too early not too late)
Lazy around at home ,surf the net, procrastinate , waste time , read the papers , watch some bloomberg, check cbot for reports on agriculture trading(gotta learn how things works to pwn my dad in future)

Rot around till 1pm.
Get my bicycle out to ride. or i can go practise some bass / read books but chances are i'll go ride bikes.

Ride till about 5 or 6
Come back home , see if my buddies made any plans for the night. if not
I'll do something like practise cards / play bass or read some books again
(i've got a shit load of bertrand , some heideggers and alot of other junk to read)

have my dinner at home or outside.
pending on the time i get home.

10pm-11pm (thats if i get home within that time range)
I'll call tzetian to run.
Short run

Ends around 12.
Come home slack.
Surf the net , play bass / cards/ read

sleep around 2.


MAN THAT WILL BE NICE!

I CAN DO THIS FOR LIFE.
AND THE OCCASIONAL OUTINGS>

THAT WILL BE AWESOME!
NO SCHOOL. NO EXAMS.
JUST ME AND MY SOLITARY PURSUITS.

Dont make assumptions. ask me if you wanna know. if not. think nothing about it

STM hits.
now i make my personal notes. in my blog.

i saw, two faces. two persons.
amongst the many that people creates.
i've created her shell as a dream.

being ez and pa. she is what we percieve to be.
our perception is that of a dream.

and now,
something else better comes along.
open my eyes, speak my mind.
burst the bubble. and realise
shes dead.

and now i have a friend. in place.
a friend who i know has no (P&C)
think about it.

two persons. in one body. one is make believe.
two personalities (whats the name ah? schrezo aiy adunno how to spell)
one make believe.
one that is nothing.


have i found god?

mixed feelings

Green european cars. FUCKING SEXY!

being emo was gay.
being emo detaches you from all things random and spontaneous in life.

being emo made me fear rejection even more.
fearing rejection caused me to avoid new experiments.

then eventually my life , became a routine.
doing things i thought i ought to do daily.
doing it not out of passion and liking.
but because of the fear of something new.
something new which can cause rejection.



SO GAY!

Green european cars!. This maybe how my 335i will turn out. but wait. it will look much nicer! hahahaha

anyways.
i really miss portsdown.
i really miss riding all day. long hot afternoons. trying laughing playing.
i really miss staying up all night practising magic.
i really miss , jamming in a band, doing gigs, learning new songs and keeping time.
i really miss playing with 4C
i miss everything good that has happened .

but!

More sexy green cars

everything that i miss.
they're not foreign they're far from distant.
theres everything i can do about it
everything i can do for it.
and ha!

my life is going to be great. far better then better. its going to be fuckin superb.

hi guys. i'm nian.

Aiyo why cant i post pictures

wah so imba. so preettyy!

AHHH! fuck. insomnia !

BOLLOCKS.

Here's whats fucking annoying.
6am , i go to bed.(say i lie on the bed, trying to fall asleep)
6am , i hit the sack. aboard my little space , 4 legs a pillow and some sheets. i thought i was off to meet my idols.

and then. 11am.
Bloodshot eyes. fuck. Frustration.

i waited in the spaceship. but why cant we assume our itinerary
yes.

Aya's got bloodshot eye's too! (ha fuck i sound like a gay shit fanboy)

I cant fucking sleep. 6am-11am. i was rolling on the bed, trying so fucking hard to sleep.


In the 5 hours, i could've rode bikes. i could've studied abit for my HRM.
Yes its 3 am now. HRM, i'm only at chapter 6/12

Amazing thing is. i've got 5 hours to learn things that i was supposed to learn in 6 months.
i learn now. i cant study . cause i've yet to learn.


Fuck!


arrgghhh

Look at those eyes man. so damn nice. so damn damn damn nice

AND.

IF YOUR BIKE SPOILS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. AND You're MILES AWAY FROM HOME.
WHO DO YOU CALL?

NIAN!

YES and NIAN WILL LEAVE HIS COMFY NEST, GET OUT INTO HIS MOM'S CAR DRIVE OVER AND PICK YOU UP!
HA!

boy i hate being nice. hahahahahah

(Y)(Y)!

(The following shit has no link to any of those shit mentioned above :D)
Importance of being unimportant works not for everyone.
Be a joker live temporary.

You seek acceptance. i seek importance.

Frustrating , easy going yuo can be . and not come of as no.1
Balance!


Learn from the green princess. to know all and yet be known nothing about.
Then you'll have the competitive edge. to make people work for you.

and yet be all so, enigmatic to the extend that. no NEGATIVE/INSULTING words in the dictionary is fit for you.

How many bad things Can you say about a guy you do not know?
even if you do. you are the one being fickle.


See beneath that ceramic smiling face.

Adios amigos.


And one more annoying thing.

( and this is also not related to any of the things mentioned/ nope theron not you . chill bro ride safe HA!)

say you're nice to someone all the time.
and they fucking take it for granted.
be normal for once and
sarcasm hits.
They think you're unwilling to help.

fuck off.

To MY BFFFFFFFFFF(DAMN GAY SIA BFF LIKE SOME HIMBO)

Nyah!

Pretty damn gay i was.

Receive what i give and open up , in turn you'll give and then it will all be fine.
Drink from my cup, then plow my fields. together we'll have rice

Invest in nothing unknowing.

I jumped into the pond, now its your turn .
Pick me up. and we'll laugh along.


Its funny.
We know yet we still act to achieve the unwanted.
Hypocritical huh?


Apply the power of suggestion.
Play god.

Create that something out of nothing and that something will be everything when you've nothing.

out of that vortex of negativity .
Embrace and enjoy it.

....


ha! doubt any of you will understand what i mean.
Speak my lingo. to my XZXCZXCZXCZCZCZVZXCZXCZX (awesome!)

Stay happy man!
Dont think too much.

"Think adequately at times but not inadequately at all times"- bertrand.

Deserving

She is queer,
She is unique as shes queer (in a good way)

Shes the easiest person to talk to as she is the easiest person to listen to

Shes always around to listen to you crap as much as you're full of crap

I love hanging out with my friend as much as she loves to shop and talk.

NYAHAHAHA



Rejoice for my super awesome lepak friend.

Of whom i think i owe a great deal to.


SINCERE!

On the quick dial. lets go talk and drive!



This deserves not to be locked away